Care for the Carer, AN ALZHEIMER’S MEMOIR
Caring for myself while caring for Jane.
In 1963, as a first year doctoral student at Harvard University, I met Jane, a recent arrival from Berkeley where she had completed her masters in medieval history.
We fell in love and made marriage our lifelong commitment. With Jane's love of Eastern philosophy, it was natural that a Chinese Buddhist priest would officiate at our first wedding. The priest’s blessing served us well during good times and bad.
"Love each other for what you are, and forgive each other for what you ain't."
Years later, with 40 years of teaching and researching as a full tenured professor, I looked forward to retirement. Yet in one moment my world collapsed when my beloved Jane was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.
Is there a cure?” Jane asked repeatedly.
This simple sentence had several possible meanings:
“Jeff, I’m slipping, hold me.”
“Jeff, I’m sinking; save me.”
“Jeff, I’m scared, protect me.”
I wanted to hug her or even to pick her up and rock her in my
arms…to tell her, “I’m here with you always,” to admit,
“I’m scared too.”
Left: Jane Camhi Right: Jane and Jeff Camhi, Boston mid-1960s
As Jane slipped away, I slipped into depression, anxiety and fatigue. Care for the Carer, AN ALZHEIMER’S MEMOIR is my personal story of a husband facing an unknown future. Guided by a wise occupational therapist, I learned step-by-step how to identify my own needs, care for myself without guilt while caring every day for my wonderful Jane.
I wanted to keep her from slipping out of my life.
I wanted to squeeze the Alzheimer's right out of her.
I wanted us to be who we once were.
None of that could happen.
But at least, from that day on, when words alluded Jane,
hugs took their place.
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Care for the Carer, AN ALZHEIMER’S MEMOIR
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Born and raised in a New York City suburb, from an early age Jeff loved music and science. Fascinated by biology he graduated from Tufts University with a BSc in animal behavior.
While studying at Harvard University where he completed his PhD in neurobiology, Jeff met his wife to be, Jane Jerome.
Moving to Ithaca, New York where Jeff ultimately became a tenured full professor at Cornell University, he was recipient of both a Guggenheim and a Fullbright Fellowship.
With encouragement and support from Jane, the family made the bold leap of moving to Jerusalem where once again, at Hebrew University Jeff was awarded tenured full professorship.
During his academic career Jeff authored 80 academic research papers, the college textbook Neuroethology and the academic analysis, A Dam in the River: Releasing the Flow of University Ideas.
After retirement he co-authored Fifty Tree Tales after creating an outdoor nature museum on the Edmund J. Saffra, Givat Ram campus of Hebrew University.
Jeff continues to live in Jerusalem and at the moment, he is working on a non-fiction science book entitled, The Locust, The Cockroach and Me.
For more information check out Jeff Camhi’s website at https://www.jeffcamhi.com
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